Tell me...........

Would you have gotten out of bed

if you knew at the end of the day someone you loved would be taken from you without warning?

Would you have made his coffee?

Would you have ironed that dress for work he loves

knowing that all you hold dear and close to your heart was leaving today?

Would you have fed his cat?

Would you have slipped into the shower using his favorite scented soap

knowing the water would turn to tears soon, and the nakedness become your heart?

Would you have said his name?

Would you have traveled the same road that would later take his life,

 only to spend the day not thinking of him ...wishing you had?

Would you have texted 'miss you'?

Would you have looked at the meaningless faces, stacked papers, lost your keys only to find them again, missed his text, gone to lunch without a word between you...................when the phone call came?

Tell me........would you have answered it?  Would you have screamed to God in anger 'why?' only to become the emptyiness that is inside that dress today?  Would you have been able to say goodbye?

Tell me.......Would you have gotten out of bed?

It's a driving force that leads me into making huge mistakes

regretting the losses, the f**k ups, wallowing in disgrace

making choices that rattle the brain

leading down the sewer drain

down, down, down I flow

like a vestibule of vomit it smells

the regret from stupid overkills

the rising lack of synapses restraint

that causes me to congregate

to others that bring me down

whose abuse to me comes unbound

wrenching to slash my wrist

I hesitate just short of the abyss

to wake up and feel no pain

and begin again another day

What he doesn't know

is that she shivers at the sound of his voice

what he doesn't see

is the goosebumps that rise just thinking of his kisses

what he doesn't hear

is her calling his name as she sleeps

what he doesn't feel

is her heart skip a beat when he smiles

what he doesn't taste

is the sweetness behind her lips

what he doesn't touch

is the warmth of her skin

what he doesn't know

is her soul waits only for him.............

she's naughty

yet he thinks he can out do her

in her affiance and perfume

she smiles

she is his destiny

she is perverted

he thinks he is a worse one than her

but he is bested

for she has spent a lifetime getting here

perfecting her mastery

for she is his fantasy

but he doesn't yet know it

she is naughty

............and he is bested..........